She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
