fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
