Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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