I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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