Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
