I CAN MOONWALK!
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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