I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
there is glitter all over my balls
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