it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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