We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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