margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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