lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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