Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
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