DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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