PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
