the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
