i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Randomize