his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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