Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
