thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
