He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize