it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
