bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
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why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize