youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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