i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
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