There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
