so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
