Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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