You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
