I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize