I'm going to jail i love you
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Still dying that you shit outside
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
