Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
