physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
