? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
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