is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize