Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
