Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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