We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
