I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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