:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize