I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
These tits shall not be calmed
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
