Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
