He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Im part way to drunk.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
