She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Randomize
