Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize