guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize
