A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Randomize
