So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
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