We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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