**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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