Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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