no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
My dick has a subreddit
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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