ADVERTISEMENT

• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.

  Fav 3 2441 827

  share tweet
  

• (615): View more from Tennessee

  Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.

  (1-615): View more from Tennessee

  I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.

  Fav 41 794 2683

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (512): View more from Texas

  I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.

  Fav 22 4903 1088

  share tweet
  

• (636): View more from Missouri

  Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?

  Fav 19 1511 4975

  share tweet
  
• 

  These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (561): View more from Florida

  The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.

  Fav 30 2520 6561

  share tweet
  

• (402): View more from Nebraska

  if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.

  Fav 7 1514 3687

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (630): View more from Illinois

  I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night

  Fav 8 1501 906

  share tweet
  

• (303): View more from Colorado

  Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.

  Fav 4 1336 1647

  share tweet
  

• (214): View more from Texas

  Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up

  Fav 6 997 1835

  share tweet
  
• 

  25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (954): View more from Florida

  I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?

  Fav 15 2398 1281

  share tweet
  

• (407): View more from Florida

  It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.

  Fav 8 1408 775

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (612): View more from Minnesota

  I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.

  Fav 5 964 558

  share tweet
  

• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  I wanted to have tiny guns for tits

  Fav 0 762 515

  share tweet
  

• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?

  Fav 2 359 705

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (819): View more from Quebec

  I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain

  Fav 3 70 126

  share tweet
  

Randomize