i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Everything about him screamed your future.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth