i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.