and she was petting her beer can
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
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did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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